Why building rapport is essential to our capacity to influence others
This week I recorded the second episode of The Good Communicator Podcast, and I talked about the basic building blocks of communication - not just speaking, which is what we usually focus on, but also (and more importantly) listening. You can make a parallel between communication and a complex dance, in which you need to know your own steps as well as predict someone else's; choose the environment carefully (where); take into consideration the mood and personalities of the people you are with (who); the circumstances surrounding the conversation/dance (when); the medium you use to communicate (how) and more (forgive me for the self-celebratory trumpet-blowing, but I really love this illustration, which I drew for the book to introduce the importance of all these elements for a conversation to be successful).
In this podcast episode, I focused on the first step of the Good Communicator Framework, building rapport.
Building rapport is not just a nice-to-have skill when discussing sustainability; it’s essential. Rapport can make or break your ability to inspire and lead others toward sustainable practices.
Why? For a number of reasons:
- Science shows that people are more likeable and trustworthy when they show genuine interest in others, ask questions, and actively listen.
- By establishing trust, collaborations become more fruitful, and influencing behaviour changes becomes more feasible.
- By listening actively, you can better understand the needs and wants of others, preventing misunderstandings and costly errors.
- By asking relevant questions you'll receive more thorough answers, which will help you identify risks and opportunities that might otherwise go unnoticed.
Since the COVID-19 pandemic, many meetings have shifted online. While this has increased efficiency, it has also stripped away the human elements of small talk and casual interactions. The loss of these "water-cooler moments" has led to Zoom Fatigue and dehumanized business relationships, ultimately affecting project success and our ability to build trust.
Small talk sounds pointless, but actually, it fosters trust and respect, which are crucial for successful collaborations. In contrast, jumping straight into business can create a barrier to effective communication and long-term project success.
Let's have a look at some practical tips to build rapid rapport:
- Prepare in advance: research attendees before events to find conversation starters.
- Show genuine interest: smile, ask questions (especially, deep and open questions, those that go beyond the surface and delve into values and beliefs; they all start with how, who, what, why and the answer is never a monosyllabic one) and listen to the answer. Discover common interests or shared experiences.
- Make others feel important: Compliment sincerely and talk about their interests. Viewing the person you are speaking to as a hero and a capable human being, rather than an adversary, fosters a co-creation environment and positive interactions. This mindset shift can transform business relationships and enhance your ability to advocate for sustainability effectively.
This article was originally written for the Green Gorilla weekly newsletter. If you liked it, subscribe to receive more articles like this and learn how to communicate sustainability better, how to be more productive without selling your soul to the work devil, and how to make an impact in the world. Here is the link: https://newsletter.thegreengorilla.co.uk/